


Sweet Dreams (Are Made Of This)

by Eins_Esk



Category: Control (Video Game)
Genre: Edward Hopper - Rooms by the Sea, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, First Kiss, Fluff, soft, the lockdown is lifted
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-17
Updated: 2021-01-17
Packaged: 2021-03-15 16:42:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,467
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28816539
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Eins_Esk/pseuds/Eins_Esk
Summary: Emily takes Jesse home with her after the lockdown is lifted. They have a long overdue talk about the nightmare Jesse had when Hedron fell, what the Hiss showed Emily while the HRAs were out and what it could mean for them.
Relationships: Jesse Faden/Emily Pope
Comments: 6
Kudos: 53





	Sweet Dreams (Are Made Of This)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [podgle](https://archiveofourown.org/users/podgle/gifts).



> I wrote this for [podgle](https://archiveofourown.org/users/podgle/pseuds/podgle). Thanks for always beta reading for me! :)

„Wow“, Jesse said as she glanced around herself.

“Right? This is actual real daylight.” Emily grinned broadly as they stepped onto the sidewalk together. It wasn’t really that good of a day. The sky was overcast, but she could still feel the difference compared to the artificial light of the Oldest House.

“I’m not sure I can bear this. Is my skin burning away?” Jesse joked, as she followed Emily’s lead.

“No, you’re fine”, Emily answered with a fond smile, gesturing to Jesse. Emily had put on a jacket, it was autumn after all and Jesse exchanged her Golden Suit for her civilian clothes. They probably actually looked like two co-workers leaving work to head home.

Jesse didn’t actually have anywhere to be. It was just that Emily insisted that Jesse should head out with her. Her Head of Research offered her couch and promised to help Jesse find an apartment, as long as she didn’t stay in the Oldest House when they could leave, now that the lockdown was lifted. Jesse was sure there was some kind of policy against this but decided it didn’t matter. She was the Director, after all. She could stay with her Head of Research if she wanted to. Besides, she was practically homeless until she found an apartment of her own.

“The people out here are just… living their lives. They didn’t even know that there was any danger. Imagine what would’ve happened if the Hiss got out.” Emily sighed. It wasn’t all that unusual to have threatening objects within the Oldest House – they had a Panopticon full of them. But the Hiss has truly been something else and she was glad that they could eradicate it.

“It would’ve been the apocalypse”, Jesse said and she was right.

Taking off the HRA upon leaving the building had been harder than Emily thought. It was now mandatory for all personnel of the Oldest House because the slide projector was still contained within it. One error and the projector could open the gate again, letting the Hiss in for another attack and they needed to be prepared for that, but they didn’t need the HRAs outside. Jesse had noticed her hesitation with a very serious look. She knew what it felt like to be possessed by the Hiss. She felt it herself when Hedron fell, just like the others did before the HRAs came back on.

Emily led them to the nearest subway station where they took the train to her neighborhood. It didn’t take long, but Jesse kept eying the other passengers suspiciously. Like they would do an inhuman bend at any moment, start to screech and try to get close enough to explode.

Emily didn’t blame her. That was what she normally thought after a long day at work, chasing Dr. Darling, trying to accomplish her work with just a fragment of the information she’d normally need. But after what she’d seen in Darling’s documents and files, she could understand why he didn’t just tell everyone about it. His knowledge was invaluable and now that he was gone for good, she felt like she wouldn’t be able to live up to the expectations he had built up for the Head of Research position. It was a good thing that Jesse had never met him, Emily thought and immediately regretted it. Even though he made her life harder, he did try to protect her by not giving her all of the information and she even missed his eccentric behavior. She could admit that much to herself.

The classification of the files did have a reason, after all. She just wished that he’d told her about some of it, so she would be able to understand what happened with the Hiss, with Trench and with Hedron better now.

They sat side by side. Jesse actually enjoyed the humming noise of the engine and the soft wobble of the train. It reminded her of the train in the Eagle Limited AWE, down in Investigations, the poor thing.

Emily leaned close to Jesse. “When we’re at my apartment, you should try and lift something to see if your powers are influenced by the Oldest House or not.”

“Sure thing, Emily. Is there something heavy you need lifted?”

“No, not really. But hey! Your cool telekinesis skills will be so useful when you move your stuff.” She noticed her error immediately. Jesse’s expression darkened, even though she tried not to let it show.

Emily frowned. “Hey, what’s going on?”

“I don’t… actually have anything to move, you know?” Jesse said, awkwardly.

“Oh”, Emily said. Shouldn’t she have known better? She’d seen Jesse’s files, or at least the ones that didn’t have a classification too high for her authorization level. She hated it that the Bureau collected all of that data about Jesse. It felt wrong to look at them, but she had read them. She felt guilty about it.

They had observed her like an experiment, letting her think she was insane, that she imagined what happened when she was a child. Letting her be locked up in that ward when they had all the answers right there. There was nothing fair about it. Of course she didn’t have any stuff to move, she hadn’t lived in an apartment before she came to New York.

“I’m sorry, Jesse. I should’ve been more sensitive.”

“It’s fine, really”, said Jesse. But Emily didn’t think it was.

They got off the train in a quiet neighborhood where Emily rented an apartment.

“Do you… sometimes blame me for what happened?” Emily asked, tentatively. She was working with the FBC, after all. Just because Jesse suddenly became the Director didn’t mean that she’d forgiven all of their sins. Of course, Emily was never directly involved in the Ordinary AWE, nor the P6 and P7 programs, but nevertheless she _was_ part of an organization that did questionable things. Questionable things she knew of. She had even done some of these questionable things herself while working with the FBC. An organization that had done questionable things to Jesse, directly or indirectly.

Jesse looked alarmed. She stopped in the middle of the sidewalk, forcing people to stop, too, to avoid running into them. “Of course not”, she said. “You weren’t even with the Bureau when Dylan and I used the projector and Dr. Darling kept you in the dark about most of it, including the Prime Candidate Program. You didn’t have access to anything when I came in, remember?”

Emily smiled, relieved and nodded, but became serious again when she replied. “That’s true. But I don’t think anybody would blame you for hating the whole Bureau and everyone in it for what happened to you.”

Trench and Darling were the ones responsible for what happened to Jesse after she ran away. She’d spent years in the foster system. The Bureau had enough information to get her out, to tell her the truth. But they never did.

All those panic attacks Jesse had about Nosebleed Neil’s transformation into that… _dog_ , and the fear she still felt when she saw projected pictures flickering. It made her feel dumb. It made her feel like she lost her mind when in reality, everything she’d seen was real. Real, and very, very dangerous.

That didn’t change the fact that Emily was the opposite of what she resented. She was friendly, curious and happy. It was a delight to talk to her, especially when it was somehow related to science because then the Head of Research started talking faster and faster, her fascination coming off of her in waves.

“I wanted to, I tried. But I’ve seen all of that footage from Darling, I found so many files that made me understand the FBC and all it contains. In the end, Darling tried to do the right thing. He saved so many people by constructing the HRAs.”

“Yeah, he did. In that last tape you brought back… He’s so defeated. It’s hard to watch”, Emily said quietly.

 _Good thing she doesn’t know about the whole ‘Dynamite’ recording_ , Jesse thought. _If that’s even real. The Oceanview Motel operated on dream logic – did that mean everything it contained was a dream? Or was it still reality?_

Nevertheless, Dr. Darling’s educational videos _had_ helped her understand the Bureau. “You know, when you first came out of that vault I was kinda disappointed that you were so nice”, Jesse said, making Emily laugh.

“Why?”

“Well, I _was_ set on hating all of you, except maybe Ahti. And out you came with that adorable smile, so excited to see me, even if you didn’t even know me, then.”

Emily looked somewhat embarrassed by that. “Yeah, I was. You know, Trench had his moods. He withdrew more and more… I guess that must’ve been because of the Hiss inside of him. But he’d been a loner all the time, the Bureau consumed him. The only exception was Dr. Darling, of course. And then you came in and you just- I don’t know.” She stopped to think for a moment. “You were everything I hoped for. Still are.”

“Even if I have no idea about anything, including Bureau policies, at all?”

“Especially because of that! Look what you accomplished just by following your intuition”, said Emily, grinning widely.

“Thanks, Emily”, Jesse said.

“Come on now, let’s go. I might even find something edible somewhere in my apartment.”

They continued walking until they reached Emily’s apartment building, going up the elevator without meeting anyone. The hallway was brightly lit, but empty.

“Do you think your neighbors wondered why you were gone for so long?”, Jesse asked as Emily unlocked the door.

“No, not really. I’ve been away for longer periods of time before. It’s just a good thing I don’t have a pet. Oh- I hope Langston’s cat is ok, he loves that furball.”

“He told me his neighbor was feeding his cat. Have you seen it?” Jesse became distracted by entering the apartment and hanging up her jacket.

“That’s good, then”, Emily said. “No, I haven’t. But he’ll talk about Alfred constantly, if you let him.”

“Oh, believe me, I know.”

They shared a smile.

“Have a look around”, Emily said, making an inviting gesture. “I’ll change and then I can see if I can scratch up dinner.”

“Sounds good.”

Emily disappeared to what must be her bedroom, while Jesse looked around her living space. It was quite spacious. There was a big window on one side, letting in the daylight. The Head of Research owned a lot of plants, Jesse realized. They sat before the window, making the room more inviting than it already was. There were succulents and ferns, even a bonsai and some of them had big leaves on long stems. None of them were flowers, she realized.

“I hope Emily talks to you, you deserve it”, she murmured and smiled at her own joke. The plants did seem a little bit greener after she directly spoke to them.

There was a grey couch that got its touch of color through different sized pillows in different shades of green. She could also see a leather armchair. Some files lay scattered around a low coffee table. _Of course she takes work home_ , Jesse thought as she sat down on the armchair, looking at the painting on the wall above the couch.

It was a picture of a room. There was an open door where the sun shone inside, hitting a wall and the floor. The door opened directly onto the sea, without a beach, just the water. In the background, one could see a room behind the wall, through another door opening. There was a couch there and a painting was hanging above it. The sun shone into that room, too.

Jesse decided that she liked the painting a lot. It was calm and light. She guessed that Emily thought the same. Maybe she needed something calm like this after a hectic day at the Bureau. An old record player beside the couch seemed to confirm this. _Vintage, huh?_ , she thought.

She heard Emily rummaging around the kitchen and went to investigate. She found her Head of Research holding up a bag of frozen vegetables. “How about stir fry and… rice?”, she asked, shaking the vegetables. She’d changed into a long sleeved shirt, escaping her blouse which _had_ to be uncomfortable.

Jesse nodded at that.

“What’s with all the files?”, Jesse asked and watched as Emily started their dinner.

“Oh, those. I- um. I was researching for my dissertation but… well I guess Dr. Darling can’t mentor me anymore. I might have to reach out to other agencies dealing with AWEs. Europe maybe? I don’t know.” She sighed deeply. “I can’t very well turn research like that in to, you know, normal professors.”

“Yeah that would maybe be too much. What were you researching?”

Emily’s eyes lit up immediately. “I wanted to see if the appearance of the light switches is triggered by specific events, or if they spawn randomly. I gathered data about appearances, happenings. I traced the origin back to the Oceanview Motel, of course, but couldn’t pinpoint if the hotel makes the switches appear, or if they’re connected to the Oldest House. Or maybe”, she said, “maybe the Oceanview Motel is directly connected to the Oldest House, but the switches are controlled by the motel? Because there were switch-appearances outside of it.”

“That is actually an interesting question”, Jesse said to Emily’s delight. “You know, maybe you can find out about the light-changes whenever you pull the cord. I was thinking about that.”

“Maybe it needs to get charged up?”, Emily mused, stirring the vegetables.

“The motel provides passage, right?”, asked Jesse, but she didn’t really need an answer. “So maybe the switches appear when the Motel senses that you are in need of a passage? Maybe it is not connected to the Oldest House per se, but to the people inside of it?”

“Interesting”, Emily said. She pulled a notepad out of one of her kitchen drawers and scribbled some notes onto it. “What makes you say that?”

Jesse sighed. “When the Hiss had me, I had some kind of nightmare… hallucination?”

“What did you see?” Emily asked, concerned.

“It’s not important”, Jesse answered. “But I could traverse through the Oceanview Motel to get out of it.”

“It helped you out of whatever the Hiss did to your consciousness?”

“Yeah. I heard Darling, as if he was talking to me through the Hotline. He told me to go to his office and there was a light switch there. I pulled it, went through the motel and got out. It was strange. I thought that all of that was inside my mind but… I’m not so sure anymore.”

“Nobody’s ever actually seen the motel, you know? You can’t leave it. We don’t know if it’s even a real place. We can pass through it, but nobody’s ever seen what’s behind the other doors. It only ever opens the same doors to us.”

“I heard people trying to get in one time.”

“Several Rangers have reported activity outside of the Motel while traversing, but we can never be sure if those are real.”

“It is a weird place but it feels good to be there.”

“Yes, it really does. It may be that the Motel really traversed you out of range of the Hiss? Whatever it did, I’m glad it brought you back to us”, said Emily, smiling.

“Me too, Emily.”

* * *

They were sitting on the couch. Emily had put on a record and they were both enjoying the calm music. Rain hit the window. Jesse sat cross legged, watching raindrops. Emily had pulled her legs to her chest, leaning sideways so that she could see Jesse.

“What did the Hiss make you see when you went under?”

Jesse sighed. “Why is this important?”

“Because your experience seems to be different from mine, or from the others I’ve talked to about it. It showed us short sequences of people suffering. The Hiss-chant, screeching. Intense red or short, loud noises and disturbing images of a dead world”, Emily said. “But it showed something different and more complex to you and it bothered you. I’d like to know what it is.”

“Alright”, said Jesse and sighed. “It showed me the Oldest House. But instead of being the Director I was an office assistant. Trench was there and everyone was working. No matter what I did, nobody was satisfied. I couldn’t finish my tasks, they kept repeating themselves. Copy this, collect mugs, distribute the mail. It only ever stopped when I would bring the mail to Trench.”

Emily leaned forward, her brow was furrowed. “It made you look at your life as if someone took everything from you, again, making you the lowest ranking member of an agency you’re destined to lead. And to hate.”

“I have nothing against working simple jobs. But I felt so alone there.” Jesse had pulled the sleeves of her shirt down over her hands and began to pull at a loose thread there.

“Was I there, too?”

Jesses brought her hand up to her shoulder. “You were. You were sitting at a desk, as Dr. Darling’s assistant or… secretary. You were talking to a colleague about P7.”

“Dylan was there?”

“No. He wasn’t... at least not at first. You were just talking about him. But after that, I brought the mail to Trench again. He was there, then. Floating, watching me as I repeated the same shit again and again. Others were floating, too. Or they were just staring somewhere, eyes glazed over. And some of them weren’t even human anymore.”

Emily shivered at that, déjà-vu flicked into her mind along with a cold feeling in her chest. “I think I saw them, too. Dark creatures with bags on their heads?”

“Yeah, those”, Jesse softly said. “They were just- working normally. It was insane. Nobody seemed to think that it was weird that they were there or that some of them dissolved into that multicolored fog. _You_ didn’t notice and you’d be the first to notice, normally. Right?”

Emily smiled. “I guess I would. I’d try to interview them, or something.”

This made Jesse smile. “Just because they were weird and creepy doesn’t mean that they wouldn’t have been polite if you asked about them”, she said and then added in a whisper, “I also saw myself. I saw versions of myself floating around like the people without HRAs. Dozens of them.”

“It wasn’t real”, whispered Emily, taking Jesse’s hand into hers. “What did I say about P7?”, she asked because she’d noticed Jesse’s reaction when she first mentioned that nightmare-Emily talked about P7.

Jesse looked away, touching her shoulder again but not letting go of Emily’s hand before answering. “That he was a good successor to Trench, because Trench got unstable. That he was handsome and competent, the perfect new Director.”

Emily was taken aback for a moment, before replying. “You realize that those are all things that I would say about you, right?”

“You- what?”, Jesse asked and then seemed to realize something. “Do you think I’m handsome?”

“Well, I’d aim for beautiful, but you know what I mean.”

“Emily… uh. Thank you”, said Jesse, smiling her crooked smile, eyes shining with actual happiness. Emily smiled back.

“So, you saw stuff you’re afraid of, there”, said Emily, squeezing the hand she held because she could. “Being alone, not being recognized as a person, feeling unimportant while others are successful.”

“I guess so”, Jesse said. If Emily figured out that the Hiss showed her things she was afraid of, then she knew now that she didn’t like the idea of Emily thinking about, well, anyone besides her, really. It was embarrassing. But Emily hadn’t thrown her out – instead she’d complimented her. That was good, then.

“So, the Hiss has shown you weird stuff, and I was trapped in a loop of my own fears? That hardly seems fair”, said Jesse, pouting a little bit.

Emily looked down. “When I said I saw people suffering, I meant that I saw you, dying in your fight with Mr. Tommasi. I saw you deadly injured by Salvador and I saw you being defeated _inside_ the mirror. I saw esseJ kill you in that strange parallel-plane, all alone. The Hiss showed me what I feared: that you’d die on one of your excursions, somewhere where no one else dared to go. That you just wouldn’t come back. I never saw any fight. I just saw you die.”

“Emily, that’s horrible. I’m sorry.”

The Head of Research offered a tiny smile in return. “I just couldn’t say that to Arish when he asked me. But he also said he’d seen similar stuff. Rangers dying, the Hiss invading the whole planet…”

“It was scary as hell”, Jesse said.

“Yes. And yet, here we are.”

“I’m glad”, said Jesse. “You know what’s strange? Dylan told me about a dream he had.”

“I thought he told you about a whole lot of dreams he had?”

“Yes, he did. He told me about one where a third person was watching us in that same moment [that’s you. Yeah, you’re that third person, watching their interaction!]. It creeped me out. But he also told me about a dream he had where he was the Director and I was an office assistant and it stayed that way forever. And ever.”

“And did he say what he thought about it?”

“He told me that it was a wonderful dream.”

“So, maybe the Hiss showed you similar dreams. Just that he enjoyed them, because he got to be the Director when you had to work under him.”

“Yeah, something like that. It’s strange. As if the Hiss knows that we’re siblings.”

“It doesn’t matter. You’re the Director and this is reality. Everything is as it should be.”

Jesse thought about that for a moment. “Do you really think that? Dylan was P7 for a reason. He got training, I didn’t. I’m basically just… a kid from the street.”

It was Emily’s turn to frown now. “Trench and Darling forced him here, trained him against his will and then dropped him cold when it didn’t work out as they wanted. I’m glad they didn’t get you. I’m glad they were so arrogant not to try and get you before you came on your own.” She gestured towards Jesse. “I’m glad you came and got us out when you did.”

Jesse nodded her head slowly, thinking about how different that day could’ve gone if she’d been there before. If she had known about all that the FBC contained. “I wonder why they never tried to get me”, Jesse said. “They knew the P7 program failed. Why didn’t they try to get me to do it? I would’ve come willingly, for Dylan.”

Emily nodded. “I guess they didn’t want to make the same mistake twice. I guess… maybe they wanted to get you when Trench retired?”

“So many questions, no fucking answers”, Jesse said, frustrated.

Emily sighed and nodded. There was so much they’d probably never know. Jesse stood up and started going through Emily’s records, looking at the covers. They were stacked neatly in a rack.

“It’s strange to think about Ordinary”, said Jesse, pulling out _Sweet Dreams_. “No one’s left to miss us, Dylan and me. Everyone we knew vanished into the slide projector. Nobody would’ve asked twice if the Bureau had taken me.”

None of them said anything for a long time. Jesse put the record back, chose another and put it on. She sat down beside Emily again. She sat cross legged and leaned her head against the back of the couch to doze, as did Emily. They just savored the peace, existing together in each other’s space.

It was quiet after the song faded out and the record player reset itself. Emily wasn’t sure why, but she felt wound up in the quiet, even though the silence was comfortable. It didn’t sit right with her that Jesse thought nobody would miss her. Emily would. But she couldn’t very well tell her that, right? Ordinary was dead. The people that vanished into the slide projector were probably dead, too. She couldn’t imagine it. Every friend Jesse and Dylan had had, every teacher, their parents. They were all gone and now the only people that knew Jesse were working for the very same agency that thoroughly destroyed Jesse’s life.

But if something happened now, Emily would miss Jesse. She’d miss her dearly. When she looked over at the Director, Jesse had a faraway look on her face.

“I miss them, you know?”, said Jesse and Emily didn’t know how to respond to that. “Our parents, I mean. We used to go on boring walks and have picnics in the garden. Dylan liked to try and climb the trees and I liked to search for signs from the fairies.”

Emily huffed. “And instead you found the slide projector.”

“Yeah, we did. And then the Bureau found us.”

“It’s unfair”, whispered Emily, looking at the floor.

Jesse agreed. “I didn’t notice at first. I didn’t notice that they’d taken my little brother”, Jesse said, voice breaking. “I burned the slides, and Polaris was so… loud”, she said and Emily thought even she could see Polaris flaring in Jesse’s eyes. She noticed the way she’d sometimes draw her eyebrows together just a little bit or how her eyelids fluttered when Polaris did whatever it was she did. “We were at home, mom and dad wouldn’t come back and Mrs. Claire, our neighbor, was gone too, and I knew it was my fault. Nobody was left. I trapped them inside the slides. I- I killed them.”

“Jesse. Look at me”, said Emily, taking Jesse’s hand in her. “You did not kill them. You were eleven. And you did the right thing, no matter what you found in those files. No matter what Darling and Trench thought about it. Whatever it was that lurked in those… dimensions, it was dangerous. Destroying the slides was the best option you had.”

Jesse nodded distractedly. “When Polaris told me to run, I did. I thought she’d guide Dylan too. I think she tried. But maybe he didn’t listen or maybe he wasn’t fast enough. When the Bureau came with their equipment and their cars, I ran. I was at the store, getting supplies for us. They were already at the door. But when Polaris warned me, she warned Dylan as well, right?”, asked Jesse, sniffling. “But maybe she didn’t… I hid and then I sneaked away in the night. I thought Polaris would guide us to be together again but… she didn’t or… or she couldn’t. I told child services that my brother was somewhere, that I wanted to see him but they…”

“They told you he was dead.”

“Yes. But I knew better.”

“You found him”, whispered Emily, still holding Jesse’s hand, squeezing it. “You did it.”

“Yeah. And now he’s stuck in a coma after the Hiss… got him.”

“You did the best you could”, said Emily. She wasn’t about to let Jesse continue to tell herself that she failed. She was a child. AWEs were dangerous. The slide projector was dangerous and what she’d seen at such a young age was horrible.

Jesse deflated, leaned her forehead on Emily’s shoulder and started to cry. The position had to be uncomfortable, somehow twisted to the side, but she clutched Emily’s hand like a lifeline. “The best wasn’t good enough, Emily. The best killed my parents and hurt my brother.”

Emily sneaked her arms around Jesse, embracing her, pressing a kiss to the side of Jesse’s head, hoping that she wouldn’t notice. “No. You contained the threat in destroying the slides. The Bureau hurt your brother. And they hurt you too, Jesse. And you did so good, don’t you see that? You rescued us, you survived all the doubt, you found Dylan.”

“Thanks Emily, I really needed that”, said Jesse when she’d calmed down. She had wound her arms around Emily, too.

“I’m sorry this happened to you, Jesse. You didn’t deserve any of this”, she said and looked down. Was it wrong to be glad that Jesse found them? She came when they needed her, even if the Bureau did not deserve Jesse’s kindness.

“No, I don’t think I did. But neither did Dylan. Or you. It was just… really bad luck for all of us, I guess.”

“That’s true”, answered Emily. “It was a blessing in disguise for us, though. We got you as the Director, which is really good. Even though it’s not fair to you.”

“I found a place to belong to. And friends”, said Jesse and smiled. “I’d sleep on the couch in my office otherwise, you know. Thank you for letting me stay with you.”

“I asked you to come with me, remember? I want you here. I want you to know that you’d be missed if you weren’t. I’d miss you, Jesse.”

“I’d miss you, too.”

The rain was still hitting the windows. Together with the soft lightning, it created a perfect cocoon of calm. The city was buzzing outside, but time didn’t seem to matter to them, sitting together like this.

“You give really good hugs, did you know that?”, asked Jesse after a while. She hadn’t moved out of Emily’s arms and she didn’t plan to. She tightened her own embrace.

“No, I didn’t. But I’m glad you think so.”

“Yeah. I think we should make this a habit, I like it”, Jesse said in a conversational tone of voice, like talking about the weather.

“I agree”, said Emily, gently playing with Jesse’s hair.

“You know what else I’d like?”

Emily had a good idea what that could be, but she played dumb for the sake of pretense and raised her eyebrows, “do tell.”

But Jesse seemed to lose her courage. She started to settle back down without a response, but Emily wouldn’t let her. “So… are you gonna kiss me, or what?”, she asked.

Jesse just stared at her for a moment before she smiled, leaned in and kissed Emily for the first time. She lingered in her space before pulling back. “Is that ok?”, Jesse asked.

“It is. This happens to be something I like as well”, said Emily, grinning widely.

“That’s lucky”, Jesse said as she leaned in to press another kiss to Emily’s lips. “Let’s do this more often, then.”

Emily hummed in response. She stood up to change the record before settling down again. The Bureau was under control for now so that they could take a few days off. There was no need to go to bed early. There was no need for anything, really. She decided to just enjoy the moment, sitting here with Jesse, kissing from time to time.

It was still unfair, that Jesse and Dylan got hurt so badly. But Emily was glad she met Jesse. She was glad that Jesse came into the Oldest House when she did, taking every challenge in her stride, no fear, no hesitation to help, even though she really didn’t have a reason to do it beyond getting Dylan back.

“I’m so glad you’re here”, she whispered into Jesse’s ear. She took her hand and pulled her up from the couch. “Let’s go to bed”, she said. “I really don’t think there’s a reason for you to stay on the couch while you’re here”, she said, blushing prettily.

Jesse let herself be pulled into Emily’s bedroom. A bedside lamp cast soft warm light into the room, illuminating a queen-sized bed. The windows faced the backyard, drowning out the traffic noise. Another picture hung above the bed, but it was too dark to see it clearly. She thought she could make out a person sitting on a bed, facing the morning sun through a big window.

Emily pulled out some clothes for Jesse to wear and let her use the bathroom first. She found the Director sitting against the headboard when she entered the room again, after she got ready for bed herself.

“This will only be awkward if we let it”, she said and plopped down onto the bed.

“It’s not going to be awkward. You give great hugs, so I can only assume that you also give great cuddles”, decided Jesse. She slipped under the comforter and waited for Emily to join her.

It wasn’t awkward at all, decided Emily. It was warm and soft and she loved it. She loved being here with Jesse. The Director leaned over and pressed a kiss to the corner of Emily’s mouth.

No, this wasn’t awkward. It was perfect. There weren’t any nightmares that night.

**Author's Note:**

> Visit me on [tumblr](https://tumblr.com/blog/einsesk) and we can hang out!


End file.
